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Is Criticism for Real...

Updated: Feb 3, 2023

Well! No one likes it. But we have all faced it a number of times in our lives. And God knows how many times more in the future we would have to go through it.

Why do people criticise..And what purpose does it serve in our lives. Why can' t people live their own lives peacefully instead of peeping inside other lives and finding faults.. Are such people insecure or over confident?... Or do they really care for us and their concern is genuine?

People always look forward to compliments. Criticisms are never welcomed. Everyone has flaws in them. No one is born perfect. There is perfection in imperfection.

Honestly I never liked criticism.Though I have been a victim of criticism numerous times. But with the passage of time I realised that criticism is not always bad. In Fact it is the first step of the ladder to success . But nothing comes without if and buts. Certainly the tone, intention and person who criticises matter a lot. It is very important to analyse and distinguish between positive and negative criticism.

Like the two sides of the coin.. It has both negative and positive effects.

It is very important to know the category of the criticism in order to deal with it.

Certain types of criticisms should never be ignored. Mostly the constructive ones which are always helpful and try to bring out the best in us. Such type of criticism comes from our well wishers and near and dear ones.They are concerned about our well being and definitely not done to harm us.

I have faced both kinds of criticism.. be it negative or positive..

I would like to explain it by taking instances from my personal life.

When I first started writing, my cousin who is a doctor by profession took time from his busy schedule and read all my articles. Though he liked my writing.. Still he found my work average and suggested that I take a few professional write up classes to enhance my skills as a writer. I know he loves his sister a lot and his concern was genuine. Certainly I could not let such criticism go without paying any heed to it. Infact when I went through my initial articles it definitely had few flaws. So this kind of criticism should never be overlooked or be angry at. But certainly to be worked at.

My cousin' s criticism helped me polish my writing skills . I am thankful to him for his genuine advice.

Next category belongs to destructive/ negative criticism. Such criticisms are to be ignored at first. But if it gets too much to bear and it interferes with your well being, definitely one needs to backfire . After all, it's our

life . And we cannot let anyone ruin it by their negative criticisms.

Such people are either jealous, insecure, or have some kind of superiority complex inside them.

And the answer for such criticism is criticism … to shut their mouths.

In this journey of life, we meet all sorts of people. There are few who always want to be one step ahead of you. They would intentionally find faults in you and leave no chance to let you down.

Most times they are jealous.. Other times such people are insecure and cannot tolerate that one rise and shine..

I could not help narrating an incident which happened a few years back. It was my habit to pick and drop my son from school everyday. Me and my friends would assemble at the school gate half an hour before the dispersal and would gossip.I and

One of my friends is a single parent. One afternoon, one of our married friends commented on our being single in a tone which we definitely couldn't tolerate. The remark was made intentionally to hurt our sentiments .It was hard to ignore such criticism. My friend is a very beautiful and confident person and outspoken at the same time. She immediately backfired..' Why are you guys jealous of us being single.. We are still enjoying our college days. ' That was so true. We had enjoyed our lives more than our married friends. She and I would leave our kids to school early in the morning and have breakfast at McDonalds and watch the morning movie show and would return on time to pick our kids up. We would park our cars at the metro station and would board a metro at rush hour. It was so much fun. We would be effortlessly pushed inside the train on arrival and thrown out in the same manner at our destination. We have raised our children in the best possible way. We have had fantastic lives. Why should we mourn and be thankless to God? We have enjoyed our lives to the fullest. I have had wonderful parents who always loved and supported me and stood beside me like pillars. They loved me more than my brother. Sometimes he would get jealous and say, ' All love is for your dear Gudia.. Where do I stand'. I have no regrets in life. I am very happy and content with my life.

So why should I bother about such negative criticism? There are people who find faults even with my profile pictures. And would ask to replace it. And I know this was done intentionally to let me down. Such people definitely suffer from some kind of insecurity. I have never had the guts to ask such people why they keep replacing their profile pictures with donkeys and orangutans and what not.I know our parents have not taught us to be indecent. At least my profile has my own picture in it. I am sorry if I hurt someone unintentionally. I did this only to convey the message,' Do not judge a book by its cover. Think twice before criticising anyone. Every person has their own unique identity and personality which makes them special. And certainly cannot be subjected to negative criticism if it cannot be respected. Every individual has the right to put on their profile whatever they like. You have options to like it, comment on it, ignore it… at the most block the person.

So please do not fall prey to such criticism. Self love is important. Always try to differentiate between constructive and destructive criticism. Don' t be a victim.. Rather emerge as a winner.

Sounding more like a psychiatrist than a writer… hey… but I am not charging any fees. I should better run away now rather than being found by some psychiatrist and cursed for stealing his bread and butter. Happy Reading… till we meet again.

Looking forward to some positive criticisms too.😊

Thank you for taking out time and reading the article. 🙏

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