top of page
Writer's pictureMukta Kapur

Tender Relationships

Updated: Feb 3, 2023


What do we actually mean by a relationship? It is how one individual is connected to another , the feelings and behaviour they have towards each other that gives rise to a relationship . The relationship may arise as a consequence of biological factors,romance, marriage, friendships or just by default we meet an acquaintance and form a bond. Relationships are of utmost importance in life as they satisfy our emotional needs and give us the warmth and care we look for in our lives.. Man being the most social of all the species , enters many kinds of relationships during the course of his lifetime.. It's something that we cannot define. It's a very broad term. The very same relationship can be a cause of happiness at one point of time and at other times cause of sorrows and miseries.. The equations keep changing with different people most of the time. Yes..relationships are complex in nature.

Very few relationships are stable and provide emotional security in the present day.. Most of them have fallen into the category of just give and take..

The biological relationships.. Our parents and siblings, children . . The bond we share with them still ranks on top among relationships as it is one of the purest and offers unconditional love and much needed support at all times.. Not to mention here if one finds a right life partner in life.. It too goes a long way and makes life very pleasurable and joyful ..

When in pain and dealing with the issue at hand,we always think of our parents first, most of the time as we know they shall do their best to pull us out from the misery we are in. They shall not exploit or laugh at our problems but would go to any extent to ease our pain. This is one of the prime reasons for relationships' existence.. To provide support and comfort during trying times.

Relationships contribute a lot towards our physical and emotional well being.. A happy and satisfying relationship generates positive vibes and makes life situations easy to deal with. On the contrary, unsupportive and poor relationships can cause more stress and make things all the more difficult to handle.

No matter how strong we are, we all need a shoulder to cry on at times.. We need to unburden ourselves..

A child's primary support is his parents.. As he grows and his mind develops, he tries to build friendly relations with others be it with neighbours, teachers, classmates.. He tries to understand the concept of relationship and its impacts on one's life. Then when he enters adulthood, he looks forward to forming romantic relations, later marital relationships.. At the workplace it's with colleagues.. He develops a bond.. So at every stage of life, a new relationship develops and evolves..




No one can live all by themselves.. We are born to live in a society.. The very characteristic of being human.

No ceremonies are accomplished without our relations.. We take pride in our relations and need them to be a part of our joys and sorrows alike.

Although it is saddening to see the relationship bonds falling apart these days. Any relationship requires trust, faith, respect, patience and time and one needs to nurture it to grow into a powerful bond that can withstand all the odds.

But many of us lack the time and patience to invest in relationships these days.. We are so much busy with our lives, making both ends meet, somewhere we just ignore the value of our relations . We have just reduced ourselves to money making machines in the materialistic world where we live. Sometimes we are so self absorbed in our private lives, that we hardly care to know who lives next door. In the past, in fact the whole neighbourhood was a part of an extended family.And please do not give the excuse of being too busy in one's lives for if one cared and valued the relationship, they shall always find a way and time to strengthen the bonds.

We have become loners now. The joint family system is a thing of the past.. I sometimes think about how it would be like to live in a joint family where each and every person had stayed united , no matter if their views differed.All brothers, sisters, cousins, mother,father, uncles and aunts under one roof. It would be so much fun.. Of course there may have been arguments among them at times, but at the end of the day love between relations is what kept it going. Children of the joint families were emotionally more secure as they were loved and cared for not only by their parents but by uncles and aunts, grandparents, all.They were taught to value love and relationships from the early stages of life itself. They developed the habits of sharing and feelings of love and care , art of adjustment and compromise required in every relationship. I think we need to bring the system back to save the relations.. Everyone respected the head of the family who in turn looked after everyone's needs well.. There were no ego clashes.. Everyone valued relations and played their roles well.



But now everyone looks for privacy which has paved the way for nuclear families. No one likes boundations.Then there are ego clashes in relations, for very few are kind enough to give up on the arguments for the relations one values.. The world has undergone a complete change. Most of the marriages fail due to lack of trust, faith, time and ego clashes..

Money and power is another root cause of failing relationships. When the element of money comes in between relationships, it maligns and ruins everything.. Often in between siblings and cousins, when the powerful and wealthy relative is favoured.. equations change.. Love is replaced by hatred and jealousy.

In a relationship all stand equal.. There is nothing like more or less.. We all need to be fair.. Elders need to be respected and the younger ones need to be treated with love..Learn the art of forgiving and forgetting soon. And it has to be from both the sides..The feelings need to be mutual to keep the relations on the right track. One needs to know how to string and keep relations together like the pearls in a necklace.

Do not hold on to the grudges for long.. As it creates rifts in relationships.. Never stop talking.. Instead try to find a cause and work out a quick solution. Do not abandon or break the bonds in relationships.

It takes years to build a bond and only minutes to break it. Let not that happen..

Savour the different flavours of relationships. Enjoy the sweetness, tangy, spicy, salty, smoky, hot in relationships.. For they make our life journeys memorable and pleasurable.

Value relationships.. Do not give up on them.. Work on them and try to build forever lasting bonds. For if they rot and die along with them shall die the feelings of love and care..what shall be the use of teaching our children about values like sharing, caring, sacrifice and loving when they would not have any relations to hold on to in future.

We are never too busy in our lives. Instead we are lazy and how much priority we attach towards our relations matters in a relationship. Let's be more human, more compassionate when it comes to maintaining the relationships and strengthen the bonds which go a long way for our own physical and mental well being and make life journey a pleasurable and joyful experience.





412 views3 comments

Recent Posts

See All

3 Comments


Guest
Feb 05, 2022

Very nice and very sensitive topic which has lost its value with the progress of humanity and now relations are deteriorating and no one is bothered except few sensitive people. You have written so beautifully mean you have feelings in it.👍👍🥰

रिश्तों में प्यार रिश्तों में खुमार रिश्ते बेशुमार

रिश्तों में तकरार रिश्तों में जीत रिश्तों में हार

रिश्तों में संवेदना रिश्तों में अपनापन बेशुमार

रिश्तों में छिपा अपनों का समर्पण और प्यार

रिश्ते में सच्चाई रिश्तों में मिठास और खटास

रिश्तों की गहराई रिश्तों में बना देती विश्वास

मां बाप का अनमोल प्यार अनमोल व्यवहार

सबसे जुदा रिश्ता सबसे ऊपर है हमारे पास

खुदा भी ना जाने कैसे कैसे रिश्ते बना देता है

अनजानों को जाने कैसे दिल में…

Like
Guest
Feb 05, 2022
Replying to

🙏👍🌹🥰

Like
bottom of page